There is a lot of change that has happened to me in the past four months now. It has been hard to even come to terms with how much has happened in my life. Just four or five months ago, I thought I would be engaged to my ex. I thought I would have a career, and I would be working on having a home and a family with the person I thought I was going to marry. Since the summer change has happened. I graduated college, I broke up with my boyfriend and have not heard form him since, a lot of co-workers I have grown close to left, my grandma passed away, and my single mother is dating someone. I have experienced so much emotions ranging from sadness and grief to joy and peace. The joy of all this change and transition is that I find myself growing more into the person that God wants me to be.
Before, I was molding myself into the shape I thought someone wanted me to be. I realize how foolish I was to think four months ago that I had my life figured out. My life and family are changing. I can see God’s hand in all of this and he has been with me every step. My deepest need right now is to trust him. I have felt fear before, but I can see him trying to pull me out of it. I don’t know what exactly it is that I fear or am uncertain about, but I am trying to rely on God and believe that I don’t have to worry. I know that he knows the plans he has for me. I trust him day by day.
I know that this period of my life is a blessing from God. I believe he is preparing me for the responsibilities he wants to give me someday.